Sometimes, the knowledge that I’m walking on air is exhilarating. Hey, I have no idea what I’m doing! And I don’t have to! I’m just making it up as I go along — just as everyone else is doing!
And sometimes, when I can really see that nothing is holding me up, it’s absolutely terrifying. Holy shit, folks, I have no fracking clue what I’m doing.
There’s been a lot of terror lately. And so my mind keeps turning to this poem, written during the spring of my pregnancy with the Critter.
CONSIDER THE LILIES
My little peanut, my sweetheart, what have I done
to bring you into this crazy world?
I trust that the sun will go on rising,
that the crocuses will break through the cold, hard soil again,
spring after spring,
but what do I know?
I consider the lilies
growing with the wild grass
along the side of the road.
They, too, take each day as it comes.
When the rain falls, they drink up the rain.
When the sun shines, they turn their faces to the sun.
Photo credit: Mandy Jansen